It is nothing but ‘Mindfulness’. Pause and take a breather, then look at the query/ problem or behavior/ attitude of self or someone else, again. Challenge your assumptions, could there be some other perspective, beyond the visible? Most of the time that deep breather will calm you and enhance your ability to take a more informed action/decision. In other words, you would be responding, not reacting!

Last week, at my workplace, I had to conduct some workshops. Going through the schedule I noted a workshop that had a clear conflict with my regular work. I quickly reached out the administration. It was late at night in Sydney but early morning in the UK. I messaged the timetable coordinator for this workshop. The lady at the other end mentioned, there was none scheduled for me then. I was only a buddy for that session. I had started my day too early but I did not want to give up even at midnight 12!

I sent her a snap shot of the schedule and asked, “Hey Lizzy, hope we are on common page.” She was calm and popped up a lovely message “Yes, Sonu, but these dates are from February schedule and we are in March. You can find the March one on….”.

Phew ! I was tired and had slipped into auto mode, as in fast thinking mode, sifting through what ever came my way, with my eyes half open and there was Lizzy …exemplary of slow thinking. She must have challenged her assumptions about me, by factoring in the time difference, my fatigue and possibly my mindset, being aware that I had gone through bereavement recently and a tech glitch too, in my preceding session.

We both left on a smiling note, where I felt comfortable in communicating my apologies and embarrassment because I could see that she was understanding. I had no fear of being judged or being less valued because I was trying to make sure, that I do not miss a session or compromise with my regular work. She was trying to ensure likewise.

Bottom line?

‘Slow thinking’ facilitates inclusion in the workplace. It minimizes undue conflicts, nurtures mutual respect, and enhances harmony in the workplace. While Inclusion starts with “I”, it is a journey from “ME” to “WE”. When we can empathize with our teammates, we are in a better position to work collaboratively. In principle, people feel excluded when they are misunderstood. This could be just because of their diversity, such as age, gender, socio-economic status, ethnicity, neurodiversity, etc. Sometimes it could be self-inflicted too, due to unconscious bias.

So next time you get a query/email/cold shoulder, do not fail to pause. Yes, occasionally, we all tend to slip into those auto modes, just as I did, but do not fail to pause..... if the reaction cycle prolongs…because it might be time to RESPOND and not react!!